Sunday, October 4, 2009

A New Me

So last night-when I couldn't sleep-I got to thinking about life and more specifically my life...
I have decided to change a few things about my self...I have always been the people pleaser type of personality...never really sticking up for myself or for what I believe or feel...so I have decided to change that about myself...
A few different things have brought on the feeling of needing to change that type of personality...
One thing is that this life is too short to not live it to the fullest...and I have always worried about if people like me or not...and I came to the decision that if they don't well then that is their lose not mine...People need to like me for who I am and not because I am always trying to please them...so the new attitude is if you don't like me then don't be around me...
I have also made that decision because I don't want my boys to have that personality trait...I want them to be who they are and love themselves for who they are...I want them to be able to speak their minds freely and not worry about what others think of them...and the only way I can teach them that is to live that way...I also feel that because of my personality trait of being a people pleaser that I have just let things pass by that have hurt my family in order to keep peace and I am done with that...it kills me to see any of my boys hurt (Chuck, Odin, and Cort)...I feel I need to protect them...Yeah Chuck is a big boy and can protect himself but some things he can't protect himself from and I have seen the hurt in his eyes and seen his heart break and I have had to pick those pieces up and it is not fun...it makes me angry to see him hurt and to have his heart hurt...he says he has grown used to certain things (which is sad) but I know him and I know the look on his face and he is just trying to put up a good front...So for me "The gloves are off"-as my wise Aunt Hope would put it...no more People Pleaser...I am going to say what is on my mind and I am going to do ANYTHING and EVERYTHING to protect my boys (All 3 of them) from getting hurt in any way...I know somethings will slip through and still hurt them but I will be here to tell them the truth and to give them lots of love and show them what a FAMILY is all about...
I love you Chuck, Odin and Cort...You guys are my world and I will be here for you
ALWAYS and ALWAYS

5 comments:

  1. I think this is a good decision you have made. It's about damn time. For the record, I have always loved you for everything you are and not what you think you should be. You are a good person, one of the best I know and I'm proud to call you my niece. I love you!!!

    ReplyDelete
  2. Hi Love! I am happy to hear you say all these wonderful things and that you know the people who love you (the only people you should care about anyway) will be the ones who stick around you. So it's a win win decision!!! I love you and I hope I can take your advice and do the same for me and my beautiful boys. Take care okay!!!!!

    ReplyDelete
  3. I always thought you were the type to speak your mind and stand up for what you believe. I guess I never noticed you being a people pleaser just a really friendly person! I like it...good change is always fun! You will do well!

    ReplyDelete
  4. YOU GO GIRL!!! There is nothing wrong with wanting to make others happy as long as you don't lose yourself along the way and always put your family first! I hope you embrace this new attitude and know that you are an awesome person with a beautiful family!

    ReplyDelete
  5. I hear ya here Brit....when you master it let me know, I've never been able to figure this part of my life/personality out myself cause I'm the same way. Good luck to ya on this! You'll be happier once you do I'm sure.

    ReplyDelete